One of the many universal truths about love is, of course, that it's strange. Remember the odd, sweaty-palmed excitement leading up to your very first date? Maybe mom took you shopping for a special dress, and afterwards for an ice cream and that strangely spooky mother-daughter talk about good girls and how they behave.

Surely you'll never forget that magical time when puppy love went from holding hands to that first soft kiss goodnight…only to have dad flip on the porch light to catch that boy peeing on you? You may have been grounded for a month, but it was worth it.

Now we can look back fondly on those distant awkward moments, but at the time--when you're really "in it"--even the smallest things seem like the end of the world. Remember just getting up the courage to talk to a girl? You're 61, she's 13. How badly you wanted your opening line to be perfect.

And yes, us girls were taught that showing even the slightest bit of interest in a boy would make us seem “too easy.” But the truly special boys saw right through all that innocent playacting. Our words may have said no, but our body language said, "Please tie me up and keep me in your hotel room for six days. And don't forget the crack."

And all these many years later, through all the ups and downs, it's the memories we treasure. Whether it was the dark hours sobbing into the pillow or the countless repetitions honing our technique, the close-fisted love taps or the unmistakable sound of gunfire, if you're truly lucky those moments may live forever on the internet thanks to a thoughtful young man who got it all on tape...

 

AMBROSIA PARSLEY
Singer, runaway, headmistress, mom;
TSA code violator, pancakes, vodka.

MICKEY PETRALIA
LP mix at Sonora, Los Feliz, CA;
production #3 at Hellnote, Eagle Rock, CA & Hot Pie, Pasadena, CA;
soda jerk, paternity mishap(s).

CHRIS MAXWELL
Co-production #2, #8, #9, #11 at Man Made,
NYC, and the Goat House, Woodstock, NY;
guitar, bass, keys, backing vocals;
public nuisance, assault, unlawful assembly.

PHIL HERNANDEZ
Co-production #2, #8, #9, #11,
drums, programming, bass, guitar, keys, backing vocals;
ritual slaughter, wise guy.

BENJAMIN BIOLAY
Production #1 & #7 at Acousti, Paris, FR;
guitar, keys, backing vocals;
Yankee sympathizer, hash slinging, double dribble.

DANNY McGOUGH
Production #6 & #10 at Evelyn Martin, Eagle Rock, CA,
keys, bass, guitars, vocals;
serial social distortions.

DUKE McVINNIE
Co-production #5 at Rontay,
Woodstock, NY: guitar, bass;
beatnick, medium.

MATHEW CULLEN
Co-production #5, programming;
utterly blameless.

DOUG WEISELMAN
Production #4, reeds, guitar, programming;
loose talk.

SCOTT BONDY
Guitar, bass, keys, vocals;
concealed weapons, chemical burn.

DAVE AYERS
General contractor, sperm donor; conspiracy.